Yeah, I’ve heard all your sayings about “what’s meant for you will never leave.” And “what’s meant for you will always find a way.”
But what’s meant for me left.
It left me drowning in a lake of my own tears. It left me confused and stranded in my own mind. What was meant for me left me in fear of my own judgment. It shook me to my core when it left me.
It left me in shambles, and it felt like shards of glass puncturing my heart. It left me feeling lonely and worthless like I wasn’t good enough. It left me even though I loved them with every fibre of my being.
They still left me.
They didn’t mind when I poured everything I had of myself into them. They didn’t mind that I came every time they called. They didn’t mind that I was simple and easy to please. They didn’t mind me being the me that they needed. They didn’t mind asking me for more. They didn’t mind leaving my heart on the floor. It’s easy to see they sure didn’t mind themselves when it came to me.
Although they left, I’m here to stay. I got over those emotions they brought my way. I rose above the hurt and trauma they buried me under and gained strength. Now, I’m happier, I think.
He left me, but I am relieved.
He left me even though he was meant for me.
You see, what was meant for me left so easily. But what was meant for me has changed. I deserve more.
My life has changed, and he was no longer meant for me. They left me, and now I am free.
I am free. My mind at ease; I no longer lose sleep. I can now just be me, and I am thankful for this change.
At first, the loneliness was purely exhausting. The self-blame ran deep. I never got closure, so I gave myself closure. I decided I would make myself happy, and I would make myself feel secure. So I did that.
I got back into the career of my dreams. I got back into writing, into feeling. I’m not afraid to feel my own emotions anymore. I practice self-care weekly, I focus on my positive traits and talents. I built myself back up. Now nobody can tear me down. I needed that. I needed to realize that I AM for ME.
When no one else has me, I have me.
So when your soul hurts, and your heart just doesn’t understand… give it time, and I am sure you will see. What’s meant to be can always leave. You are ever-evolving, so let it be. “There will always be more that’s meant for me.”