This is an open letter to the woman I used to be.
I want to say to you, I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for not turning down your voice and letting others in, for not trusting in you, and for believing the words he used to say about you.
I remember that you use to have this fear – a fear to speak, to laugh, to cry, to be happy, to be sad, to be seen, to be heard, to be understood.
You began to fear everything, even your own life.
Because every emotion you had meant a reaction from him. From the end of his fist, to a venomous verbal attack, and everything in between.
You convinced yourself it was you. That whatever you did was wrong.
If only you were prettier, slimmer, or more intelligent, everything would have been okay. I watched your confidence slip away from you. With time, your learnt coping mechanism was to not feel – only to function.
To the woman I used to be.
I am so proud of you. Because one day, you knew exactly what you had to do, and you began. Even though all the voices around you continued to voice what they believed was best for you.
And in time, they began to fade. I know, some days they are louder than others, but believe in yourself and one day they will disappear into the past.
You have been on such a journey, with plenty of bumps, twists & turns in the road.
Now, you have outgrown friends who only offer criticism and no support.
You are drawn to humans who create and see beauty in this world.
You only seek conversations that excite the soul, you no longer want dull or meaningless conversations.
And you take a stand when you see ignorance and inequalities, and you use your voice to ensure love and humility is heard above anything else.
You no longer listen to people telling you, that you are not enough.
You have outgrown people who fill your mind with self-doubt.
And you seek only to fill your soul with love.
You stood in the face of adversity, and marched on.
Thank you for never giving up on you – on us.
You have evolved, and you have never been freer.