Feminine energy receives, and masculine energy gives. This is the way it is; the way it has always been.
I’ve come to understand how masculine and feminine energy exists in all of us; regardless of gender.
I’ve also noticed how society is unbalanced. Our world has been shaped by masculinity. Leading women—or any other gender who identifies with the feminine—to think they must adapt to masculine norms in the workplace, out in society, and even in romance.
This pattern of patriarchy does not applaud feminine prowess unless the masculine can profit off of it.
For example, women have historically been expected to maintain the home so a man can go to work.
Today, this pattern has metastasised. Except now it’s affluent women, who are often white, that go to work in the office, while immigrant women are hired to watch their children or clean their homes.
This isn’t meant to shame any woman who dares to build an empire and raise a family. It is an important example that indicates how we are still off-balance. Rather than integrate true femininity into our culture, we’ve all contributed to re-purposing patriarchy.
Reclaiming balance between the masculine and feminine comes in small steps
The example above reflects a structure that the western world has spent several centuries solidifying. Therefore it won’t go away overnight.
But what does push us forward in a positive direction, is committing to balancing our own lives and remaining critical of the world around us.
As I was doing just that, I stumbled across a simple practice that allows me to regain balance by channelling my feminine power.
Leaning back; when I’m in a meeting, on a date, or in a casual conversation.
It seems small, but this practice produces big results for me in my professional and personal life.
I’ve also found that when I intentionally incorporate feminine practices into my life, I’m able to see patriarchal structures more clearly.
Clarity helps us dismantle oppression, because we can grow for the better and become someone who leads and lives life by example.
Whether you are in a business meeting, working in a team, or out on a date, this practice can amplify your energy by reconnecting you to your own femininity.
Leaning back during a business meeting
For years I was the right-hand woman to a CEO, and I absorbed how my boss ran a successful business.
I became unafraid to pick up the phone and network with an influential stranger. I put together teams. Hired or fired staff. And I ran meetings.
I was honing my professional, masculine energy. One of outward action, expansion, and pursuit. Any feminine impulse I ignored, because I did not trust this energy to serve me in business.
The first time my boss let me sit in on a negotiation, I expected to see him proudly proclaim his idea and lean forward in a domineering fashion. I expected stereotypical masculine body language.
To my surprise, whether it was with a client or a competitor, my boss always leaned back. He listened. He beckoned other bodies to come toward him. And he received.
Nine times out of ten, he subtly landed the deal he wanted.
Feminine energy is an underutilised superpower
I am my own boss now. And since I’m a woman, I give a lot of thought to how my womanness affects each element of my business.
Feminine energy is an unused superpower in the world of business. And whether it was conscious or not, my boss realised that.
This isn’t to say that feminine people shouldn’t be assertive or take on positions of dominance as well. As I stated, all humans need a balance of the masculine and feminine.
But since everyone is expected to mimic masculine traits in the workplace, feminine people are often exuding more effort because we’re keeping up with the status quo.
But being off-balance is exhausting.
Now, rather than meeting another person’s dominance with masculinised intention, I make efforts to lean back during meetings. Even if I’m on Zoom.
It allows a sense of calm to wash over me, without taking any power away from my intentions or passion.
Channelling your receptive energy can create more confidence during a date
Understanding feminine energy isn’t just a powerful way to draw a negotiation closer to your interests. It’s an empowered way to shift the dynamic on a date as well.
One of the best ways to increase your feelings of worthiness is to actually receive the good that’s coming your way […] When I first started practising being a better receiver, I […] changed my body language […] leaning back instead of leaning forward all the time.
Kate realised that when she consistently did something so simple as lean back she “turned up the volume on [her] feminine energy;” Allowing her to feel more anchored in the interaction.
By positioning her body in a way that allowed her to receive, she was actually taking a more active role.
She was also building trust in her own worth. Because leaning back, with the intention of receiving, produces the quiet confidence of femininity. One that demands that those around you provide value.
By the way, this tactic applies to romantic partners of any gender. As a queer woman myself I can attest that masculine and feminine energy exists just as powerfully in queer relationships. However (in my experience) the roles are far more fluid than most heterosexual romances.
Regardless of your lover’s gender, Northrup confirms that “leaning back is a great way to invite energy towards you instead of always proactively giving energy to the other person.”
Never stop expanding your capacity to receive
When I used to receive compliments, I would always block them.
Thank you for calling me beautiful, but I swear I got no sleep last night.
I’m touched you liked the presentation! To be honest, the fonts were lack-lustre and the colour scheme was bland.
Not only was leaning back a simple practice to integrate, but I started recognising my ability to receive in other ways.
This includes accepting compliments, and honestly thanking someone for noticing and voicing their thought. It also meant learning how to ask for help, which is another powerful way to receive.
Most the ambitious women I know, myself included, have a shared personality trend. We aren’t just Do-It-Yourself-ers, we are Do-It-By-Yourself-ers.
If I’m not careful, this attitude bleeds out into all the areas of my life.
So, if you identify as a woman (or with the essence of femininity), I invite you to take stock of all the ways you currently side-step your ability to receive.
Make a list. Pick two areas to start creating change. And discover how empowering it feels to trust in your worth.
Not only does this build confidence in yourself, it makes it that much easier to spot a colleague or lover who may not have your best interests at heart.
Trust in your masculine and feminine energy.
You already have everything you need within to cultivate an empowered, balanced life.