Happiness Is Not Hidden In What You Don’t Have
What would your life be like if you searched for happiness in simple things? Do you ever wonder that?
What’s happiness made of according to you? Where do you look for happiness?
Is it beyond the borders of a country? Is it sitting on the shelf of a luxury bag store? Or, is it up to someone else’s appreciation?
Well, all these certainly can make anyone happy quite easily. But how long would it last?
A day? A month?
Walking down the crowded streets of the city, stopping by my favourite bookstores, chatting with random people, meeting my besties for dinner and making plans as to where to travel next; all these things I have been doing for years not knowing how precious each one of them was. They mean so much more to me now, compared to my younger years.
I will be 33 soon. And If I was asked to share what I’ve learned so far, I would say, “look nowhere else than to the ordinary to find happiness.”
What has happened to us that no matter what happens, happiness seem so out of reach?
Whatever it is, it has so much to do with our perception of happiness.
We were hunters, we were gatherers, we travelled across the seven seas, we built cities, we questioned, we created, we grew, we destroyed and then we rebuilt. While all this was happening, one thing seemed to never change.
It was our love born from our unity.
I guess it wouldn’t be wrong to say that adapting to our environment has been an innate skill embedded within us from the very beginning. I say this because what I have read and observed so far tells me that, no matter what happens, whatever the conditions are like, human beings have always strived to find a solution in their life path.
Compared to previous generations, we are more used to dealing with difficulties associated with our individuality. The way we experience individualism is either very mundane or materialistic. Most of the time what I see is only a selfish interpretation of individualism.
I’m better than the rest, I bought this, I have that.
So, unsurprisingly, the word empathy has almost lost its meaning because of the way we live our individuality. Maybe it was not the happiness itself that has been far from us, maybe it was us constantly pushing it away.
Due to our modern, busy lifestyles, we have taken so many things for granted. We built houses by pouring concrete in the middle of nature, hunted for pleasure, perceived prudence as folly. Eventually, we felt utterly convinced that we were in charge of the course of life.
But we’ve lost our connection to nature, where diversity has co-existed in beautiful harmony. We have lost track of the collective conscience and thinking.
Running after personal ambitions, we were made to believe that happiness would follow.
Believe me, happiness is not hidden in what you don’t have.
So, do not enslave your soul to the order that traps you into huge buildings. Your soul should have neither walls nor windows. Your soul knows exactly where you can find your happiness.
Just look around you; go on. Have a closer look.
Happiness awaits you in the warm sunshine on your face, the scent of a rose, the friendship of a cat, the smile of someone you inspire.
Perhaps we had no other choice but to keep up with this ongoing order that has broken us away from the spirit of time and nature. Perhaps we never thought that there could be another way of living. Because we were born into this reality; and for the sake of finding ourselves a place into it, we had to grow far away from ourselves.
And we did so.
We grew away from ourselves until we no longer remember how to enjoy even the smallest things. Unfortunately, we have suppressed our spiritual sides. Because that was going to make us more real and powerful than ever.
What we thought we owned has turned out to be an outcome of a corrupted reality. It is a reality that puts self-interests over collective love and peace, a reality that divided us into subcategories by our looks, ethnicity, colour, gender. We moved away from each other, forming bonds with no depth. We made ourselves lonely when we thought we were chasing happiness.
Sadly, the way we feel happy has changed over time as well.
We thought that happiness was a race, so we ran and ran until someone put a prize in our hands. Because we always needed something tangible to glorify the race. That’s why we’re always in a hurry even when we don’t need to hurry.
When I look around, I see a lot of people complaining. They do not know why. Complaints, never-ending complaints. And the sentences always start the same.
I want, I need, I can’t stand… to be happy.
Honestly, I like complaints.
A few years ago, someone I deeply love said, “it’s good that you complain. It means you know what makes you uncomfortable. So, now that you’ve made your complaint you’re ready to act.”
However, the source of our complaints caused by our unhappiness is always similar. For the materials we don’t have, for the physical features we don’t have. In short, for every single thing we do not have we act as if the whole world is against us.
What if the path to happiness is closely linked to togetherness?
What if happiness is about learning to give; with no intention of taking?
What if it is time for us to define what happiness is made of?
Happiness does not only come from achievement. When you were a child you were simply happy. That is your nature. If you go against your own nature to be happy, you will never get anywhere. To be happy is not the ultimate aspect of life. It is the fundamental aspect of life. If you are not happy, what else can you do with your life? Only if you are happy, can other great possibilities arise in your life.