I have tried time and again to find a man who respects me and my boundaries—someone who likes me for more than just my body.
I am angry, disappointed, but not surprised. The first time we hung out, it was like a fresh of breath air. Cheesy, but true. You made me laugh so hard; I remember going home and thinking, “I could make this work.”
Our opinions were different, but I put that aside because you felt good, and this felt good. The second time we hung out, I made my intentions clear.
I told you about my past—how I was used for my body and how I’d been hurt so many times.
“You deserve better.” you said, “I would never do that to you.”
God did that feel good, thinking I had finally found the person who wanted me for me. You comforted me, listened to my bullshit, and complimented me.
So when you said you wanted to be “just friends,” it stung.
You did exactly what I expected, but still, I forgave you. I always forgave you because I thought you needed time.
But then, you changed.
Your shitty excuses to not see me were lame; you were mean and shoved my feelings aside. You made me cry; you made me hurt.
I was committed to you because you asked me to be, but you were on online dating sites. Isn’t that just the cherry on top?
I guess that is the difference between us: I would move mountains for the people I care about, and I expected the same. It’s not your fault; I just thought you were better.
So, casual dating? Hookup culture? Not my thing.
A message to the ladies: stop settling for less. Stop thinking he will change.
Stop ignoring the red flags.
Why do we continue to put up this?
We are beautiful, and we should respect ourselves and respect one another. Don’t lose confidence in yourself because a silly boy doesn’t want you.
If every guy you have been with has used you for your body, you haven’t met a real man yet.
He is not the guy for you if he has commitment issues or is indecisive about you. Evolve your self-perception and learn to love your mind—not just your body.
To send you off on a high note, not all men are scumbags. Some will stick around to cuddle you, so don’t ask yourself what you’ve done wrong when he’s the one who screwed up.
You’re not an idiot, and neither are you an object. And you know what? You’re definitely not crazy.