It’s normal to want to wish away all your bad days.
The struggles, the heartbreak, and all the tears you couldn’t keep from falling.
Because no matter how good your life is today, in this moment; sometimes, just sometimes, you find your mind making that trip down memory lane again. It just can’t help itself.
And we all know what that feels like.
A snapshot of high school, when you felt so alone walking those corridors, and like you’d never fit in no matter who you became.
A flashback of a date you went on where he gave you butterflies, but coldly never called you again.
The most recent row you had with your parents, that taught you family won’t always feel like family.
Opening the letter that politely informed you you didn’t get in to the college you dreamed of since you knew what college was.
The day you realised, after four years together, it was finally over and there was no coming back; because no matter how much someone loves you, they might still not be good for you.
The day the person you loved and cherished most in this world passed on. And you wonder where they are now.
Days that hurt like hell. Days that felt like a living nightmare you just couldn’t wake from. Days where you wondered what the fuck you did in a past life to deserve feeling your heart slowly tearing between your bones.
I’ve had my fair share of days like these. I know you probably have, too. And every now and then, you’ll think about them.
The ones who hurt you the most, and the ones who left. The dreams you wished for, and watched shatter. The memories you wish you could forget, but they’re etched in your shadow.
And sometimes, you find yourself missing today, because you’re reliving all your yesterdays. Yesterdays you want to erase, or leave behind.
But it’s these memories, and these moments, that have shaped us into who we are today, in this moment.
It’s these moments that gave us empathy and understanding of what other people might be growing through. It’s these moments that taught us how to love, how to lose with grace, and how to heal. It’s these moments that showed us no matter how hard life gets, you’ll make it through, and you’ll be stronger and wiser for your struggle. Because you’re here, now. You made it through those days.
And no matter what happens, you’ll make it through again.
Your pain, your shame, and your regrets will always have a place in your head and your heart. Hopefully, no more than a small one. But there’s no need to wish them away.
Because we learn far more from our bad days, than our best ones. About ourselves, about others, about life and how to live it most fully, most authentically; without apologies for who we are, who we want to be, or what we love.
Your bad days might look similar to mine. Maybe they’re worlds apart. But they’re yours for a reason.
They’re your teachers, your challenges, and your lessons.
And I want you to know you’re greater than all of them.