I’m Taking Back The Word “Bitch”
Bitch is one of those catch-all phrases commonly used against women.
A woman is off-putting? She’s a bitch.
A woman is opinionated? She’s a bitch.
A woman exhibits more “masculine” traits? She’s a bitch.
A woman refuses to sleep with a man? She’s a bitch.
A woman acts in any way that men perceive as threatening? She’s a bitch. And the list goes on and on.
It seems like all women are bitches.
I can’t count the times I’ve heard men call women bitches, either in real life or online. Even when men get called bitches, it’s usually because they’re acting “feminine,” hence the often used insult “little bitch” when referring to “weak” men. Hell, I’m surprised I haven’t been called a bitch more often myself.
I am a big fan of reclaiming words and destroying ridiculous societal assumptions. I’ll be damned if I don’t do the same for my gender. Many insults are used against women, but bitch is one of the most common and oldest. Words have power, and it’s time for us to take that power and those words back.
In fact, I’ve concluded that, yes, I am a bitch. And so are other women who wish to reclaim the word.
Being a bitch means being part of the so-called call-out culture that men and white people dread so fearfully, which is simply calling people out for their bullshit.
It means calling out so-called justifications for misogynist behavior with phrases like “boys will be boys” or “she was asking for it.”
It means calling out people for victim-blaming women and contributing to rape culture.
It means calling out people for slut-shaming women but cheering men for sleeping with women.
It means calling out people when they call women “nags,” “shrews,” “harpies,” “bitches,” “whores,” “cunts,” or any other derogatory term used to insult women.
Most of all, being a bitch means you demand respect. It means you demand to be seen and heard and treated like a fucking person. It means you don’t let people undermine you because of your gender. It means you stand up for yourself and others, not taking crap for anyone who treats you less than your worth.
According to society, a woman who loves herself is a bitch.
A bitch is a woman who accepts herself for who she is. A bitch is a woman who makes time for self-care and self-love. Because she knows she’s the only person she’ll always be with and values herself highly enough to make herself her number one priority. She does what she wants. when she wants to. A bitch is a woman who speaks up, speaks her truth, loudly and proudly. A bitch is a woman who supports other women and doesn’t see other women as competition. A woman who tells other women that they’re worth more than what misogyny tries to tell them. A bitch is a woman simply living her best life, igniting her spirit and offering her light freely for other women and the world to bask in.
When you love yourself, love others, exude confidence, and are generally happy with your life because you’ve made your own decisions and dared to pave your own path, some people feel threatened.
They envy your self-assuredness, confidence, and the fact that you don’t need anyone else to validate your worth. They want that energy themselves but are too busy tearing other people down. Calling you out for the littlest things, thinking that if they tear you down, they can take what you’ve got.
But the truth is, none of that matters. You don’t owe these people shit.
You can and should go around practicing compassion for everyone, but that never means you lose your self-respect. You don’t have to make yourself small to make others feel good about themselves. In fact, making yourself as large as you can shows the right people that there’s room for everyone to shine.
It means that when people call you a bitch, you smile at them proudly and say “Yes, I am a bitch, and I’m damn proud of it.”